We're # 2 - We Try Harder!

It's the 2nd of January in the second decade of the third millennium since Christ shook the pillars of Heaven & Earth by audaciously embracing the human condition.

No resolutions - just plans to embrace our changing human condition and to interact with it in increasingly hopeful ways.

We moved Steven to Moose Jaw yesterday for the last time. In 4 months he'll graduate and burn his "school furniture". I hope he keeps one or two pieces. Susie and I have a stack of purloined N.A.D.P. (Northern Alberta Dairy Pool) plastic milk crates that once stood as the foundation to the bed we loved on and slept in. These tough plastic boxes that proclaim their allegiance to their owner - "Property of N.A.D.P" - with enduring words embossed on their sides, have moved our meager sticks and stones from Jasper, to Edmonton (and around that Town) to Saskatchewan and our current Flatland Home. They predate our vows, our children, our current careers and remind us of our humble beginnings.

Occasionally I ruminate on how our illegal possession of these items will be dealt with in ultimate terms.

"Now Brian," the Lord rumbled, "about those milk crates."

"Doh!"

But we can't recompense their owners - the N.A.D.P. is long gone, either defunct or absorbed by another corporate entity - so we're stuck with them and their dubious provenance. I console myself with the thought that their rightful owners never made the type of deep, emotional investment in them that we (or most likely only I) have. My practical wife might blush at the pixels I've squandered on such mundane items, but so often it is the mundane, the utterly pedestrian, the commonplace that marks and holds the connection we have to the historical and the profound.

You can't say Stonehenge is just a bunch of rocks - even if that is just what it is.

So why did I use a title that was the corporate slogan of Avis Car Rentals in the '70s? Because, the two days of 2010 have served to remind me that we are not first, or primary, or most favored. We are average, second string, among the masses. But we TRY!

We are all growing, learning and reaching forward towards a future that will likely turn out to be something quite other than we imagine - and we are so like so many others who do the same. And within that trying is the genius and glory of being human and living.

From humble beginnings including a bed laid upon purloined milk crates to a home that has raised three young men and launched them into the world with their own meager beginnings to tell their own stories of struggle and strife, triumph and truth, we are standing on the cusp of the next chapter in the "great adventure". It ain't on the front pages or burnin' up the blogsphere - but it's a ride we are enjoying.

Hang on! When you try harder you sometimes go faster!

Shalom

Uncertainty in Uncertain Times

This post at Internetmonk.com caused me to comment - something I don't often do.

A lot of people think I "have it all together" because I'm a pastor. The truth is that my journey has raised more questions than answers. So why do I persevere? Because of the one thing I am not uncertain about - God's love for us all through Jesus Christ. I guess that's faith. It may not seem intellectual, but it is where I am - questions, doubts, insecurities and uncertainties notwithstanding. That is what He has done for me. And it's enough.

"It's the end of the world as we know it,

And I feel fine."

Lyrics from "It's the End of the World" by R.E.M.

Hitting The Wall - Good Thing, Good Thing!

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:8-10.

So I read this article at LeadershipJournal.net and after my eyes were able to refocus from the blinding light that went off (as Handel's "Hallelujah Chorus" played at '11' in my head) I wrote this post.

We want it to be 'finished'. We want it to be 'done'. We want to 'arrive'. I'm speaking about sanctification. But if we were ever able to claim total victory wouldn't we also claim we had outgrown Christ? I have victory because Jesus provides to to me by His grace and because of His sacrifice. I am saved every day by what He did, not by what I do. Should I resist temptation, sin and the Devil? Yes!! Am I lost because I fail and fall? No!!

Obedient dependence. It's a good thing, and it comes from hitting the wall (my wall) and learning in humility that the only way for me to go forward is by His grace and mercy.

Shalom.

The Process

The though from the Word on my mind. 2 Timothy 2:15.

The frying pan/fire thing is just a joke really. I procrastinated. I waffled. I was distracted. But finally I finished my ordination paper, showed it to our association Credentials Committee and our church leaders, got feedback, made changes, met with the Committee, made it through the meeting (with more input and tweaks suggested) and I have been recommended to face an actual ordination council.

This part of the examination process was easier, even more helpful and encouraging than I had hoped for. I made the process harder on myself than I had to it seems. But I was, and still am, taking it very seriously. And I discovered that I am the frying pan. I'm being seasoned to remain in the fire and not burn everything that I touch. That's the process happening here.

God is graciously making me a little bit more useful in His Kingdom.

Wheeeee............

I can really get stuff going sometimes. I don't mean to, but it is always an irresistible urge in me to ramp up any irony I find in a situation - even more so it seems if I have a personal stake in it. The reason I'm saying all of this is because a discussion has been going on over at "At The Master's Feet", a blog I contribute to.

I'm working towards my ordination and something popped up at our recent Association meetings in this regard. It has spilled out into emails and our blog and I may have made things worse. You can read and decide for yourselves.

The point I want to make here is this: I'm a Christian and a pastor - and I sometimes have no idea whether or not I'm actually helping when I say stuff or ask questions or make observations. I love and respect everyone who is posting on "At The Master's Feet". They are my brothers and I would never want to disrespect or hurt them. But even so, it seems I may have contributed to the creation of a potentially out of control spiral.

It's a good lesson for me, and I want to share it with you. Most folks think "Christians" are folks who believe they have all the answers, are always right and are never confused. "Monkey Feathers!" Says I!!

We struggle with our understandings, our issues and our doubts as much as anyone else does. What keeps me staying the course is that I really believe that Jesus wins! I really believe that grace and mercy and love and forgiveness wins. I am confident that even though I may be confused and uncertain sometimes, if I fight for the loving, gracious, positive choice then I will have glorified God and it will work out.

You can go to dozens and dozens of websites on the internet and read the writings of the confident and assured Christians who have an answer for everything. I love being involved with the wonderful guys on "At The Master's Feet" because they are willing to 'get into it'. And maybe that means that we will occasionally ride an out of control spiral to somewhere. But Christ is everywhere so.....

WHEEEEEEEE..........

I Don't Know Everything

I saw a blog posting by my son today. We share an interest in webcomics and the recent Wikipedia vs. Webcomics furor has caused both of us to opine online.

What I didn't know was how brilliant my son is. He's been out of my house for 4 and 1/2 years now. He's married and he's insanely smart. I gasped when I read his blog. It was like I was discovering a person I didn't know.

There is nothing like seeing the future unfold in the lives of your children to make your own mortality sit up and say. "'Sup, bro?"

There is a time in everyone's life when they think "they've got a good bead on things" and that is a transient experience. It seems lately that I've transitioned from a time in my life whem there were more things that were beginning, rather than ending to a time where more things are ending rather than beginning. But perhaps it is simply that I am clearing space for a new set of things to begin that will be bigger, deeper and more profound than what has gone before.